HomeblogStupid Tax Got Me Again.

Stupid Tax Got Me Again.

I just spent the last week in literally one of the most beautiful places in the world (Malibu, B.C.), but man oh man does it feel good to be home. Girl Ninja and I spent most of the weekend playing catch up on chores – grocery shopping, laundry, cleaning. Yesterday, we got to step away from our “grown-up” duties as we celebrated one of our closest friend’s birthdays….at his parents lake house 🙂

We spent the day wake-surfing, swimming, eating, and celebrating our friend. Things were going great until I made a terrible decision. A decision I will not soon forget. I approached my beautiful bride after an hour or so of being on the water (she stayed behind to catch some rays in the yard) and asked her if she would like to join me for an epic paddleboarding session. For those of you that don’t know what paddleboarding is, it’s essentially a long foam surfboard that floats on the water. You stand on it and with a long oar and row yourself around the lake. See Exhibit A:

This is not me

Being the genius I am, I suggest Girl Ninja and I attempt to ride together on one paddle board. She would sit on the front criss-cross-applesauce, and I would stand behind her and paddle us to and fro. Being a good sport, she hopped on the board, I stood up without issue, I got a few strokes in…and sure enough our momentum, mixed with the waves, mixed with my lack of balance caused the surfboard to being flipping. I jumped in the water, and at the very moment my head was submerging, I realized my sunglasses were still on my face. Or at least they were. In the blink of an eye they were ripped off my head out of reach. They found a new home on the lake’s floor. 

If it was a crappy pair of $10 sunglasses from Rite Aid it wouldn’t be a big deal, but these were $170 Ray-Bans. I instantly had a pit in my stomach. Not so much because I lost the glasses, but because I was stupid enough to get in the water with them on my face. Stupid, stupid, stupid.

I paid a hefty fine in stupid-tax yesterday. What’s more, although Girl Ninja felt bad about my loss, it didn’t take her more than few minutes to say “See, so now when I do something stupid by accident you have to give me grace.” She takes my moment of self-deprecation and makes it a teachable moment. We all make mistakes. We all do stupid things at one point or another. And if you’re lucky you’ll have a partner that not only tells you what you did was stupid, but will use it as an opportunity for them to get a “pass” when they do something equally stupid down the road. Gotta love that girl.

Time to go get myself a no-name pair of sunglasses until I can prove to myself I’m responsible enough for a luxury pair.

p.s. Here is a picture I took of Malibu (and yes, those are snow-capped mountains shooting out of the ocean)…



  1. I had to stop buying nice sunglasses several years ago when I realized I have a bad habit of putting them in my back pocket and sitting on them. The funny thing is that I haven’t done it once since I started wearing cheapies.

    I wore prescription glasses when I was younger… One summer at the lake, I dove off the boat, came back and asked my mom for my glasses, and realized I had been wearing them. They were brand new! I had to go back to school shopping that year with no glasses (which is fun because my vision is really horrible) while waiting for my contacts to come in. So I feel your pain on both fronts!

  2. I lost my prescription glasses jet skiing. I had to wear my prescription sunglasses until I could replace my normal ones. I felt pretty stupid wearing them at night. I’m pretty much legally blind without my glasses.

  3. Ha! Tax for living in a lovely place, more likely! 🙂

    Seriously, I, too, feel your pain. My problem is I keep forgetting things and misplacing them. And you know what’s funny? When I leave my cheapie sunglasses somewhere, someone always brings them back to me. When I forgot my RayBans somewhere, I never saw them again. So I’ve also been on the cheapie bandwagon until I am more responsible. (I like how you said that.)

    After 40 years, I’m slowly coming to the realization it’s probably not going to happen soon. 🙂 You know what they say, right? Every village has an idiot. For some reason I just can’t seem to find ours…

  4. Anything, cheap or expensive, can be lost, damaged, or stolen. The problem had nothing to do with your sunglasses, but rather your apparent inexpertise in handling the paddleboard. If you hadn’t fallen into the water, or you had had been able to react in time to put your hand to your face to keep the glasses on, there would be no issue. As it is, $170 is a minor expense for an easily replaceable item, and basically I wouldn’t worry about it.

    Since this is apparently turning into the Sunglasses Thread, I use mine only when driving because the 2010 Toyota Camry allows significant glare on the windshield because of the idiotic way they designed the clock well on the dashboard. The sunglasses (good quality ones bought from my optometrist) are stored in the visor above my seat, and always stay there except when I drive into the sun.

  5. Sucks sooooo bad!! Sorry dude, that really really sucks. At least you were somewhere cool when it happened. When I’m on the job, a lot of times I use those dumb looking things that you tie to each of the sunglass arms so that if they fall off your head, they’re still around your neck. Although, I don’t use that when I’m working with seirous power tools becuase you don’t want your neck to be attached to sunglasses if those sungalsses are getting pulled into a power tool!

  6. Your post brought back some painful memories! My husband bought me a pair of Serengeti sunglasses for Christmas 2005; I looooved them! I wWent on a week-long business trip to Budapest, Hungary in July 2006, and I lost them on the 2nd day; I was sweating bullets when I called my husband and told him I lost them. I back-tracked everywhere I’d been that morning, but they were nowhere to be found.

    Now that I won’t spend more than $30 on sunglasses, I’ve been wearing the same pair for about 4 years now…. funny how that works!

    Glad you had a great time in Canada! 🙂

  7. Oh man I feel you pain on that. I have a pair of Oakley’s that I’ve become a little obsessive-complusive about taking care of, because I’ve been careless in past and have cracked the lenses or just wipe them with a shirt and it causes scratches. I hate those moments that you can’t take back that cost you a lot. For me it used to be street-sweeping parking tickets. There is just no reason to get them, yet I still do.

  8. I just got a pair of perscriptions a few months ago, after losing my last pair several years ago. In between, I would wear contacts with cheapies whenever I was in a high-sunglasses-risk situation, like skiing, hiking, white water rafting, etc. However, I don’t like wearing contacts at work all day because I’m in front of a computer. When I found out that I’d be driving into the sun to and from work for my internship this summer for the first time, I knew I had to get real perscription sunglasses or I’d get myself in an accident from glare.

    Every time I go white-water rafting, I get reminded by the raft guides to get croakies or wear cheap sunglasses you wouldn’t mind losing. Not sure that would have helped this particular situation if you completely flipped over, though. But it’s a case of a couple of bucks possibly protecting a much more expensive investment.

  9. That is rough. I had a similar experience lately, except it was just swimming, on a wavy day and I was lucky enough to catch them before they were lost. Beautiful photo at the end, what a beautiful place !

  10. This just happened to me. Lost my $120 shades I’d had for 4 years to the bottom of a lake. Fell off the back of the boat (don’t ask). My solution: hit up eBay for a similar used pair. I found some for $85. An $85 stupid tax is better than $120. Beautiful pics.

  11. Get yourself a few of these to use on the water:

    I just started kayaking and bought myself some in a couple of different colors. I don’t buy expensive sunglasses, but my eyes are super sensitive to reflected light, so if I lost my sunglasses while on the water, I’d be in a world of hurt! 🙂

    I’d say $170 glasses are worth $9 to keep them around your neck if you capsize again. 🙂

  12. Bum-ski’s! How did we miss that you lost your sunglasses?! If I would’ve known that, I most definitely would have jumped on the “give me grace when I make a mistake” bandwagon…from Blake, not you. 🙂

  13. My wife buys cheap sunglasses and breaks them all the time. I calculated she spent close to $200 one year on replacing them. I have had the same pair of Oakley’s for the better part of a decade. People made fun of me when I purchased them, but I take care of them because I would be soo pissed if I broke or lost them. Same thing holds true with a really nice watch.

  14. Glad to hear you had a good time at Malibu. So sorry to hear about your glasses though – I hate then that happens 🙁

  15. Ugh! I hate the stupid tax. I have ruined countless pairs of sunglasses, so many that I ask my wife to pick me up 2 pairs of $10 aviators for my birthday every year. They actually arent so bad!

    What was paddleboarding like – aside from taking a dip? I want to take it up.

  16. I freakin’ love The Stupid Tax because it hurts and it hurts bad. The Stupid Tax keeps us on our toes. It makes us vigilant to avoid future stupidness.

  17. I learned about 10 years ago I can’t handle the responsibility of expensive sun glasses. Every vacation I take I go buy 3 or 4 pairs. If I am lucky 1 comes back lol

  18. I wear glasses full time and cannot make the switch to contacts. Every pair I have are $100+ perscriptions, and I had a similar experience with a canoe a few years ago. The river water was muddy and I could not retrieve them. My new best recommendation is to buy one of those $3 bands that attach to the glasses with a rubber grip and hold them to the back of your head. You won’t exactly be making a fashion statement, but who cares when you are married anyway right?

  19. I’m not sure what is more stupid, losing $170 sun glasses, or purchasing $170 sun glasses. My wife and I get the $10 ones from walmart so when we lose or break them, we don’t feel bad.

  20. I sat on my prescription Prada sunglasses last month. I had them for 5 years but I still feel your pain. I was bummed mostly bc I loved them, not bc they were so expensive. Life things cost money, that’s just the way it is. I recommend you get replacement ray bans right away. You will eventually anyway, right?

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